Your whisper is fast and silent. Those are newsreaders.
As soon as there's a ray of light, there comes someone who closes the door and reminds it's illegal for creatures like me...
Whatever funny it might look, it made me feel better when my teacher from University praised me for working at almost 3 places and gave advice about studying not to make myself too tired. After that a few more good things had happened, and I went home feeling about to enjoy a football match. Btw, I had guessed the result! ^^
When he came, I told him the teacher praised me, I had forgotten who I am and thought he would be happy for me. I know I'm stupid and naive. No, I don't mean any guy, he is a man. A very close person. Even more than close. And I love him just because he is who he is, all people love the ones with whom they're in this kind of relations. When he heard about the teacher's words, he made an annoyed face and started telling mum a story about how he let down a colleague at work, a young girl, he told her she doesn't work properly, and said she is just like me. I will not tell anyone about the details, too painful. But I thought... Anyway, nothing. It doesn't matter anymore.
They want excellent marks and excellent work - and I cannot make their expectations come true... I understand I'm an empty place, a loser, and that I get what I deserve. What the teacher said is the result of my stupid true-to-life self-PR. And when I was told I look good, I was meant to be a whore and look like one, and that person wanted to buy me... And I thought... Used to think...
Whatever happens, I'm grateful to loved ones for letting me know what the real world is and showing me my place in it. I often fly up into the clouds, and they pull me down to Earth from there. I know what I am now, and wouldn't be too disappointed when sb else tells this to me. What can hurt me if I already know I'm a piece pf shit?
Sometimes I'm jealous for friends who are loved just for being who they are. Not depending on marks or achievements. Who would have support and not "I told you, I knew it..." comments if sth bad happens.
Whatever funny it might look, it made me feel better when my teacher from University praised me for working at almost 3 places and gave advice about studying not to make myself too tired. After that a few more good things had happened, and I went home feeling about to enjoy a football match. Btw, I had guessed the result! ^^
When he came, I told him the teacher praised me, I had forgotten who I am and thought he would be happy for me. I know I'm stupid and naive. No, I don't mean any guy, he is a man. A very close person. Even more than close. And I love him just because he is who he is, all people love the ones with whom they're in this kind of relations. When he heard about the teacher's words, he made an annoyed face and started telling mum a story about how he let down a colleague at work, a young girl, he told her she doesn't work properly, and said she is just like me. I will not tell anyone about the details, too painful. But I thought... Anyway, nothing. It doesn't matter anymore.
They want excellent marks and excellent work - and I cannot make their expectations come true... I understand I'm an empty place, a loser, and that I get what I deserve. What the teacher said is the result of my stupid true-to-life self-PR. And when I was told I look good, I was meant to be a whore and look like one, and that person wanted to buy me... And I thought... Used to think...
Whatever happens, I'm grateful to loved ones for letting me know what the real world is and showing me my place in it. I often fly up into the clouds, and they pull me down to Earth from there. I know what I am now, and wouldn't be too disappointed when sb else tells this to me. What can hurt me if I already know I'm a piece pf shit?
Some patient came out to smoke, and I asked him if there's a nurse anywhere. He showed me where she was, I came to her and wanted to ask, but was a bit disappointed, and at once thought of using my press card if the situation gets too bad. I know my fear of doing sth wrong has big eyes. But I asked her something about "the guy who was brought here, whose nose was broken, his name's D. *. ..." - and the nurse answered me in which room he is. Easy. I knocked on the door and came in, we talked for some minutes, and then went out as he needed to smoke. Of course, I read him a lecture about being in hospital with a broken nose and smoking. I really wish he didn't do that. As well as I'd love him to quit drinking. And then...